Postcard To Shri Mutalik

A little something i came up with as a mark of solidarity with the Pink Chaddi campaign (visit)

Why?
Since men can't contribute pink panties.... at least, not me anyway...

...and since there are no pink Frenchies being manufactured...

...and since any undergarment contributed by me would require, previous clearance from BARC before being mailed...

...and since i do not believe in Ted Kaczynski's methods, lol...

...and since i do believe that my "Primum non nocere" oath means something, no matter how bad the Bajrangi's get...

Ergo;

To do my bit, and chip in my share to this andholan, i thought i'd create my personal token of resistance.

With a little postcard - "To Sir, with love" :-)

Noise Cancellation Technology... In Church

If you have ever had the misfortune of having to enter a church when a Tamil-mass was in progress, or have had to suffer though the Tamil-hymns you know how universally bad the Tamil-choirs sound. And there is remarkable similiarity in the sound. =universally screechy.

The choir-members themselves are usually either, um... "ceruminously-occluded" or "acoustically-impaired", and so are unaffected by the sonic-torture they let loose on the congregation - amplified manyfold by "high-definition speakers". What this means is that the speakers are placed high enough that no sufferer can jump up and rip out the wires.

The congregation, in an attempt to save their auditory-apparatus frantically employ Noise-Cancellation-Technology by producing identical waveforms of an equal intensity. By singing along.

No doubt the serious audiophile will know that this same technology finds use in special-audio devices such as in the earphones of Military jet-pilots and Astronauts. This is a cunning use of wave-physics in Church!!!

If one cannot apply this defense, and are forced to sit silently- as a result of one's ignorance of Tamil, then nothing can save one's ossicles - the notes will be so high and nasal that soon one's ears will start to bleed. But the songs will go on. And on.

...Compelling reason to start learning decent-Tamil saving for BOSE Headphones!!!


Read more: Noise-cancelling, BOSE® Patented Technology
Technorati Tags: humour, religion, tamil, church, choir, BOSE, technology, headphones

The AoL experience

(Retrospective Post)

(adjunct post to "Back from THINK INDIA)

VVMP...Ved Vigyan Mahavidya Peeth is the actual name of the AoL ashram where i spent 3 days. It's not too far from the city to be inconvenient... just remote enough to get lose the urban feel we all arrive with.


I confess i haven't been to many ashram's... The only ashram i actually have spent any meaningful time in is the Aurobindo ashram in Pondicherry and in Auroville. Auroville, of course, sets a pretty high standard, and i found that VVMP matches up quite well...


The ashram is spread over 70 acres, and the adjoining lands are mostly fields, some of which are tilled by the Ashramites themselves, as part of their ashram work schedule. There are also a sprinkling of Health Resorts and private farmhouses near the campus, many of which function is quasi-spa's, offering Massages and Ayurvedic treatments, keeping with the 'mind-body-soul' theme of the place.


The ashram itself is built on a set of 5 small hills, with a lake close by. The are the usual kiosks for internet, essentials, spiritual literature, souveniers, laundry, mail, ATM, visitors-desk etc... A massive accomodation facility is located at the base of the hill, consisiting of around 250~300 single rooms, where most of the attendees stay, including some of the International participants. On the ridge of the hill itself, looking down towards the lake are various bungalows where most of the foreign participants stay, in 'ashram-luxury'. At the highest point is the guru's abode... where SriSri stays, looking across the amphitheare carved out of the slope of the hill, to the jewel of the ashram- the Vishalakshi Mantap.

(The Campus the hilltop...our room's at exteme right)

It is a breathtaking sight to see at dusk, when lit up, with its dome pulsing myriad colours. It consists of 6 levels, 2 of which are accessible to the public.... me and a senior managed passed off as Ashramites and managed to make it to the 4th level....and let me tell you, the view is just fabulous. You get unparalleled views in all directions, and as darkness falls you can see the glow Bangalore's lights light up a section of the sky. Incidentally, we got caught by some Bihari guards who spotted us from down below and came up just as we were coming down...we almost got reported- fast-walked our way out, mumbling in Kannada since we knew the guards wouldn't know any!

(An evening with the Guru..."Satsang")

One of the evenings we attended was spent with the Sri Sri himself, who interacted with his followers in a question-answer session. It was a forum for people to ask questions to the Guru himself, on philosophical and metaphysical topics, and to hear his wisdom. Needless to say, everyone in the audience was quite eager to listen to the pearls of thought that Sri Sri would have to offer. The actual experience, however, was quite lacklustre... and i thought, showed the Guru to be nothing more than a wily orator. A few examples...


Example1:

(hands raised in the crowd...mike is passed to one person..)

"Pranam Guruji, i want to ask you, how one should live one's life to attain perfect peace?"

".....well....(smiles)....(pauses)....you know....if someone tells you this thing...then he does not really know....(pauses).......aaaaand....if you ask such a question to someone who really knows....he will not tell you....(smiles again)"

(laughter in the crowd...mike is passed on quickly to the next person)


Example2:

(many hands raised...one person stands up)

"Jai Gurudev! Guruji, i have come here to see you all the way from Varanasi, and i just wanted to know, if there was any point where you realized your destiny...any turning point?"

(mild laughter from the crowd)

" Well, for that i can only refer you to the many books that are available in our Spiritual Library. You read and you will come to know...(smiles)"


Example3:

(following a meditation session, Sri Sri asks the crowd if anyone was unable to meditate, man stands up...)

"Guruji, i tried to meditate but i was unable toe...because of severe back pain that i have had for many years"

"How much do you have?...100%?" (stretches hands apart)

(Man pauses..bit confused)

".....30% pain, Guruji"

"Okay, now take a deeeeep breath."

(man breathes in deeply)

"Now relax"

(man exhales)

"Now is your pain decreased?"

(man pauses....then nods)

"Now do you have pain?"

(man still nods....laughter in crowd)

"Okay how much percent pain do you have now?"

"10%"

"Only 10%!!!...and you want to keep that also!!!!"

(laughs loudly....crowd picks up on his laughter and laughs loudly)

(mike is passed on)




Seriously, dude....Whatta Sham!!!!

Technorati Tags: AoL, art of living, spirituality

Insert Holy Foot in Blessed Mouth!

REALLY REALLY REALLY FAST REPORTING!!



Regensburg, Germany- International superstar Pope Benedict the 16th, has gone AWOL!
To a sleepy university audience, he purred; and i quote: "Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find things only evil and inhuman."

Interestingly , this was a quote itself.... from a 14th century Byzantine dude, Manuel II Paleologos- who apparently rapped 'most excellently' - on holy war.
(Clearly aware of the topic's sensitivity, he mumbled, "I quote," twice before pronouncing the phrases on Islam, as if to only use someELSE's words. DID NOT WORK!)

Traditionally, Popes rarely speak out on events not related to the country being visited. TRADITIONALLY...Popes dont speak out much at all!!! Bit like Baywatch extras, these Popes.

Even during his current visit to his home-country, Germany, the Pope prayed privately for the 9/11 victims inspite of all the headlines surrounding its 5th anniversary. The Pontiff stuck to his itinerary and prepared texts, staying mum on Islamic terrorism....and then went and made some decidedly non-politically correct things about Muhammad.

Guess who clapped for the Pope's speech....the Al-Qaeda member sitting in the audience! Hehehe.

Oh yeah...trust the Paki's to arse-up things...Pakistan's foreign office spokesperson, Taslim Aslam says that the Pope proved his "ignorance" on Islam and that Muslims were "the founders of science in general". HELLO! UNCONNECTED TOPIC?!!



SPEAKING OF CONTROVERSY, here are some the infamous cartoons carried by the Danish mag Jyllands Posten Denmark...



















WHO HAS ARSED ABOUT ON SIMILAR THEMES???? BUSH!!!



...With his "Mandate of Heaven" for the Iraq-occupation!!!



...And his "God wanted me to be President" nonsense!!!








Oh, here's a joke which really cracked me up...

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months. One day, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side. . . . You know what?"

"What dear?" she asked gently.

"I think you're bad luck. Get the fuck away from me."